hello pretty lady.

Today I am at an extreme loose end so i'm going to post about something irrelevant and be done with it.

Adverts

Why are they so shit? I must spend an unreasonable amount of my waking hours plastered against the telly screen, burying myself under american sit coms and soaps, so I like to think I am an expert now ;) I really want to know what goes through peoples mindsets when they design/shoot/give birth to these monstrosities of advertising. They're either:

a) Foreign. Weird voices badly dubbed over ectstatic 'pretty people' spazzzzing over how shiny their cooker is.
b) Boring. I don't want to hear about buildingmarriageinsurance claims. Espescially not when it's all told to me by a wrinkly prune in a M&S suit and covered in a thick layer of powdery foundation.
c) Bizarre. How does a gigantic, dancing lemur make me want to buy a car?
d) Annoying. Why would some washed-up movie star with cheeks like Jack Skeleton make me want to eat yoghurt?
e) Gross. Please stop discussing the problems you have with your poop, you haggle of harpies. You're ripping off Sec & The City too. Bastards.
f) Depressing. WHO WOULD DO THAT TO A DOG. Leave it by the wayside? Well at least Rufus/Molly/Buster has made some lovely new friends and is looking all glossy. I'll send my quid off straightaway.
g) A fail. "Who'd wanna have sex with you now? Your pathetic." Nuff said.

So there you are! You are so welcome for this enlightenment.

Time well spent ;)